After a recent video showing a subway rider throwing spaghetti at another passenger, the MTA is thinking about taking away everyone’s morning coffee.
Because of one mutant nitwit teenager, food and drink of any kind may now be prohibited underground.
I understand and support the banning of food, with the smell, the rats, the obnoxiousness of it all, but a morning cup of coffee?
When MTA board member Charles Moerdler suggested at a recent board meeting that imbibing anything on the subway be outlawed, fellow member Doreen Frasca giddily clapped, called out “hear, hear!” and said it was a “swell idea.”
Moerdler chastised us slovenly masses, lecturing that it time for us all to “wake up.”
Without our morning coffee?
But take heart, subway riders. If a cup of joe can no longer help awaken you on your commute to work in the morning, perhaps someone screaming in your ear will.
The MTA recently signed an agreement with AT&T and T-Mobile to provide cell phone service on Manhattan subway stations.
“For too long, the subway system has been an information black hole in our lives,” said MTA chairman Jay Walder.
But not anymore. By the end of 2011, we will be treated to Wall Streeters bellowing into their Blackberries during rush hour. Thanks MTA!
But there won’t be cell phone usage allowed on the subways themselves. So let’s see if I have this straight: If you’re trapped between stations you won’t be able to call anyone, but if you’re safely on a subway platform you can blab away to your heart’s content?
Perhaps if Walder, Moerdler, Frasca and company actually rode the subways with us, they might see what the realities are. This might be a shock to their systems, but in many ways the subway is the last bastion of civility in NYC. People from all backgrounds and class levels coexist in peace.
OK, there might be an occasional spaghetti throwing incident, but the overwhelming majority of subway riders behave in a civil, polite manner. In fact, the subways are one of the last public arenas where we can get some peace and quiet.
But you’d have to actually use the system to know this. And as I’ve written before, until MTA execs are mandated to ride the subways with us they will never get it.
So enjoy your morning cup of coffee on the quiet platform. Your life is about to change.