Following Trump No Tweet

In an effort to keep my readers better informed and my blood pressure from getting too low, I’ve started following President Donald Trump on Twitter. Here are a few recent pearls of wisdom:

–“Of course we should have captured Osama Bin Laden long before we did. I pointed him out in my book just BEFORE the attack on the World Trade Center.”

This tweet was sent right after heroic former Navy SEAL Commander William McRaven, the architect of the raid that killed Bin Laden, described Trump calling the news media the enemy of the people “the greatest threat to American democracy I’ve ever seen.” Probably coincidence.

–“So funny to see little Adam Schitt (D-Ca.) talking about the fact that Acting Attorney General Matt Whitaker was not approved by the Senate, but not mentioning the fact that Bob Mueller (who is highly conflicted) was not approved by the Senate!”

So funny to see the President of the United States try to bully a Congressman by using a schoolyard insult a 12 year old boy would find vulgar and infantile. Not funny hah-hah, funny pathetic.

–“You just can’t win with the Fake News media. A big story today is that because I have pushed so hard and gotten gasoline prices so low, more people are driving and I have caused traffic jams throughout our great nation. Sorry everyone!”

“A big story?” Maybe in Trump’s imagination. I saw traffic at a standstill on 5th Avenue the Friday after Thanksgiving, and thought it was due to “Black Friday” sales. Silly me__it’s because our stable genius leader has singlehandedly lowered gas prices!

–“Brutal and extended cold blast shatter ALL RECORDS. Whatever happened to global warming?”

Great point! While the rate of melting ice sheets in Antarctica has tripled over the last five years, they should start freezing up again any day now. And those in Miami sloshing around in ankle-deep water after hurricanes and rainstorms? Hang in there, a dry cold front is on the way! But what about Friday’s government report warning that if we don’t start taking climate change seriously, it will cause massive national and economic damage? FAKE NEWS!

Uh-huh. Whatever you say (or tweet), Mr. President.

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