I Scream, You Scream, Save Us From This Subway Hell

The tourist had no idea what was coming.

“Great shoes!” bellowed the smiling, chunky woman from her seat on the crowded downtown 6 train. “Thank you,” replied the flattered tourist. “For a whore!” cackled the woman.

Wide-eyed, the tourist and her companion tried to retreat down the car, but the foul-smelling woman’s booming voice followed her. “Slut! What’s with that dress? Everyone can see your cooch! And what the hell are you other mother-(expletive) looking at?? (Expletive) you all!”

All too familiar with this, locals on the train stared benignly at their cellphones as the woman screamed profanities with obvious delight. But the tourists seemed in shock. Perhaps they were waiting for a plainclothes cop to emerge and throw this abusive woman off the train. Yeah, good luck with that.

This incident happened only days after Governor Andrew Cuomo tried to fend off challenger Cynthia Nixon’s relentless attacks on him in last week’s gubernatorial debate. When Nixon said Cuomo “uses the MTA like an ATM,” it wasn’t only a clever line, it rang true.

Cuomo seems to have a safe lead in the polls, and Nixon is probably too far left to win many votes upstate. But her words on our rapidly deteriorating transit system stung Cuomo, who falsely claimed that “the subway is owned by New York City.” Meanwhile, Nixon is correct__Cuomo has indeed looted the MTA for pet projects, including five million to boost state-run ski resorts, according to the NY Times.

I’m sure that Nixon, who regularly rides the subway (I’ve seen her on the west side lines more than once), has experienced her share of maddening delays and belligerent subway bullies. Cuomo? He’s up in Albany, removed from the hell millions of us endure each week. The next time you see Cuomo (or Mayor Bill de Blasio or members of the MTA board) on the subway, you can safely bet it’s for a photo op, not to actually get to an appointment.

When dead silent riders piled off the 6 train at Grand Central, the chunky woman screamed “Have a nice day, you (expletive) suckers!” Perhaps Cuomo can steal that line for his campaign slogan.

Yes, that foul-mouthed woman needs help. So do we.

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One Response to I Scream, You Scream, Save Us From This Subway Hell

  1. Marty Murray says:

    Right on! Mike. Great article. Wish we could get it to the right people. Any way to share your articles. I want to put this on my Face Book page and send it to my girlfriend. She’s so mad at Cuomo she can hardly stand it. I wish Nixon would go out and get experience instead of starting with Governor. Then come back and take on the Big Guys. You can’t start at the top.

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