And on the 7th day, God rested? Nope, he pulled the greatest practical joke ever.
If you were to pick a city where an evangelical, anti-choice athlete who drops to one knee and prays after every score and is the hero of born-agains nationwide would live and play, where would it be?
New York City, of course!
Yep, Tim Tebow is now a New York Jet. The dysfunctional team, quickly dismissed when it tried to persuade future Hall of Famer Peyton Manning to join his brother Eli in the Big Apple, has traded for the guy the Denver Broncos couldn’t wait to dump minutes after they signed Manning.
While my politics are quite different from Tebow’s, he does seem like a good natured guy and I actually think he will adopt well to the city. There’s only one knock on the young quarterback: He can’t throw the football. Hey, no one’s perfect.
But I digress. It will be fun to see how a 24 year old self-proclaimed virgin who never drinks, smokes or uses profanity will adapt not only to the Big Apple, but to big, blustery coach Rex Ryan, who curses every time he opens his mouth and has a foot fetish video on YouTube.
Meanwhile, the fans are split about this, with many worried more about Tebow’s suspect arm than his prosthelytizing ways. If Tebow messes up here, he shouldn’t expect the pass he gets from worshipful fans in the heartland. I can hear the catcalls and see the signs already: Stop praying and start playing!
But I have the feeling the fans will like this guy. While handsome playboy Mark Sanchez fits the image of a NY Jets quarterback first established by Joe Namath (who bashed the trade for Tebow), Sanchez has had a rocky relationship with Jets fans.
And despite the seeming oddity of Tebow living here, I think in many ways he is more a real New Yorker than Sanchez could ever hope to be. Not gifted with an accurate arm (to say the least), Tebow has worked like a dog to improve, is tough as nails, charismatic and a proven winner.
I believe the first time Sanchez has a lousy game (which won’t take long), Tebow comes in and sparks the team and Sanchez comes trotting back on the field, the boos will cascade around MetLife Stadium, with cries of “We Want Tebow!” driving the indulged Sanchez to tears.
Meanwhile, according to a NY Jet source, team officials have suggested to Tebow that he live in New Jersey, to “keep him away from the temptations of NYC nightlife.” Huh? I’ve lived in the city all my life, never go clubbing or to strip joints, and I’m an agnostic. But Mr. Pious would be tempted?
What are they afraid of? That the vow-of-abstinence guy won’t be able to resist the throngs of groupies throwing themselves at him? Or that the persistent rumor that Tebow is a closeted gay is true, and the large number of attractive gay men in the city will be too much for him to resist? Are they worried that he’ll find some cute fella, renounce his religion and get married at City Hall? Enlighten me, please!
Meanwhile, Tebow has already hired the famed William Morris entertainment agency to handle his burgeoning stardom and opportunities. Maybe the Jets are onto something after all.